I've found it highly ironic that consultants—who supposedly can fearlessly wade into a corporate mine field of politics, self-interests, and unique culture—turn into wind-driven jellyfish as soon as a prospect raises his or her voice. Who on earth would hire someone who falls to pieces or jumps on the defensive as soon as a potential buyer pushes back a bit?

The worst thing you can do when someone is assertive is defend yourself! I know that's counterintuitive to many of you, but no baseball or cricket or volleyball player is going to be worth much if they protect themselves from the ball. They try to pummel it, and the harder a ball is thrown, the harder it goes the other way when smartly struck.

Using Momentum

In the martial arts, one is taught to use the opponent's own momentum to throw the other person off balance and take the advantage. The same is true of objections, resistance, and even aggressiveness in the sales of services and intangibles.

For example, if a prospect says, "You're a one-person operation, why should we use you when other firms can bring many people to help us?" your reply should not be: "That's true, but I'm a specialist," or "But I'm local"! Your reply should be: "That's exactly why you need me!"

That reply will get you two seconds of stunned silence, during which you use the forcefulness of the resistance to turn the tables. You move into that silence with:

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