Truth, Lies & Unicorns: The Cost Of Dishonesty In Business

By Charles Green, Contributing Editor, and Andrea Howe

What is lying?

On a conversational level, we take "lying" to mean speaking an untruth, overtly saying something that is not the case. Webster's first definition is, "to make an untrue statement with intent to deceive." "To lie" is an active verb, with a connotation of intent.

But Webster's second definition is far broader: "to create a false or misleading impression." That definition includes lies of omission; it even extends beyond speech.

It's that second definition we'd like to explore. By that definition, business advisors (or for that matter, people) who don't lie are like unicorns: not inconceivable, but pretty infrequent. In the same sense, Diogenes never found an honest man.

Yet we say trust is critical to client-advisor relationships. How do we reconcile these two "truths"?

How We Lie

Here are five common ways we lie to clients:

1. Saying An Untruth. This means flat-out dishonesty. Even something seemingly innocuous, like saying we're fine when we're not, erodes trust. What if we're clearly stressed?
   
   
2. Speaking Truth By Technicality. Using the subtleties of language to exonerate ourselves doesn't work. Ask Bill Clinton.
   
   
3. Telling "Harmless" Fibs. Even something like calling in sick when you're not quietly erodes trust.
   
   
4. Lying By Omission. It is possible to mislead our clients with silence. Not raising the issue of scope creep, for instance, is a lie of omission. The client asks herself, "Well, why wasn't this discussed sooner?"
   
   
5. Exceeding Expectations. Under-promising and over-delivering is a peculiar form of lying; it is saying one thing and doing another. Consistently exceeding expectations causes disbelief and skepticism over time.

The pervasiveness of at least four of the five types of lying demonstrates that we'd all generally rather tell small lies, or omit lots of information, than face one encounter with the truth.
Why is that?

Why We Lie

Let's first explore the motives behind lying from a purely self-serving, utilitarian perspective. That is, evaluate the decision to lie or not via a simple equation comparing the costs and benefits of lying versus truth-telling.

Let's say the question at hand is whether or not to tell our client that we will likely exceed our delivery date, where saying nothing clearly constitutes a "false or misleading impression" (in other words, a lie).

On the Truth side of the scale there is the benefit of being perceived as a truth-teller, offset by the cost of experiencing our client's disapproval for not getting the job done on time.

Want to read more?

1. Access to our library of articles, case studies, and interviews
2. The Rainmaker Report weekly e-mail newsletter
3. A free electronic copy of Master Rainmaking Conversations